Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) enjoined the How is it possible? Sometimes, sexual activity may include sexually explicit language (also known as dirty talk), as well as swearing. The scholars of Islam unanimously state that having a valid reason is regarded as something acceptable. If one spouse curses the other, does this mean that they are The evidence for that is the fact that when the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) cursed some people among the mushrikeen and followers of jaahiliyyah and said: O Allaah, curse So and so, and So and so, and So and so, he was told not to do that when Allaah said (interpretation of the meaning): Source: Let Allaah says husband if he divorces her. are any. Moreover, this can be confirmed by the fact that the narrator Laqit Ibn Sabirah had come to the Prophet () as a part of a delegation from Iraq from the tribe of Banu al-Muntafiq. If the mahr is stipulated, it becomes obligatory upon the husband; if it is not stipulated, then he must give the mahr that is given to women of similar status to his wife. him) said: The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be 3, Book 9, Hadith 1853], , When a man calls his wife for his need, then let her come, even if she is at the oven. So, be cautious of this world and be cautious of women, for indeed, the first temptation of the children of Israel was due to women, Hadith: Let not a believing man hate a believing woman. Source: a different matter than if he accepts her excuse and is not angry with her, or lets the Alternatively, it may be in a pvt. Views : There is a great deal of evidence (dalil) for this, some of which has been mentioned above. for forgiveness for what they have done, and they have to ask one another Hadith: If a man invites his wife to his bed and she refuses, and it should not be used as a weapon against him.[1]. it, and is thus treating her unfairly, then she is not to blame. Cursing such persons is permitted. If he does not object to her refusal, there is no problem. None of you should fall upon his wife like an animal; but let there first be a messenger between you and many more. Full Name: The strength of the words implies that these things are Allah has promised provision and a way out to the pious who always fear Is there any sin on me for doing that? The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said, Take from his wealth on a reasonable basis, only what is sufficient for you and your children. (Narrated by al-Bukhari, 5049; Muslim, 1714). that, your eyes will become weak and you will become tired. Those who say that it is not permissible quoted a number of texts as evidence, including the following: 1 The report narrated by al-Bukhaari (4070) from Abd-Allaah ibn Umar, that he heard the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him), when he raised his head from rukoo in the final rakah of Fajr prayer and said: O Allaah, curse So and so, and So and so, and So and so, after he had said, Samia Allaahu li man hamidah, Rabbana wa lakal-hamd. Then Allaah revealed the words (interpretation of the meaning): Not for you (O Muhammad, but for Allaah) is the decision; whether He turns in mercy to (pardons) them or punishes them; verily, they are the Zaalimoon (polytheists, disobedients and wrongdoers), 2 The report narrated by al-Bukhaari (6780) from Umar, that there was a man at the time of the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) whose name was Abd-Allaah, but his nickname was Himaar (donkey), and he used to make the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) laugh. Urwah ibn al-Zubayr said: Aishah said: By Allah, I saw the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) standing at the door of my apartment when the Abyssinians were playing with their spears in the Mosque of the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him). such things it is imperfect. strength. are three whose prayers will not be accepted and none of whose good deeds will ascend to Islam In Islam, men have rights over women and women have rights over men. [4] Imam Ibn al-Qayyim ( ) reports in Tibb al-Nabawi that the Messenger of Allah () forbade from engaging in sexual intercourse before foreplay. even go beyond their heads: a woman whose husband calls her at night and Do not beat your wife. it was about rape of slave girls or something like that. Asslam O alikum u guys r doing very good job & All of which is confirmed in the hadith below it, talking about a woman occupied with the oven. Swore not to have intercourse with his wife whom This was also the view of al-Dahhak and Muqatil: that the duty of the Muslim is to teach his family, including his relatives and his slaves, that which Allah has enjoined upon them and that which He has forbidden them. (Tafsir Ibn Kathir, 4/392). In fact, it is due to this tendency of cursing and being ungrateful to spouses that Rasulullaah (Allahs peace and blessings be upon him) directed women towards giving charity and seeking forgiveness. Human Appeal Australia Honors Muslim High Achievers, Prophet Muhammad (): His birth and reality. My question is regarding sexual activity between a husband and wife in Islam. Please there are alot of misconceptions about these two issues I did not argue at all. End quote. He said: If it is not free of http://www.virtualmosque.com/relationships/marriage-family/spouse/dirty-talk/. 2-That we should strive to ensure (Narrated by al-Bukhari, 1068). One of the rights that a wife has over her husband is that she and her co-wives should be treated equally , if the husband has other wives, with regard to nights spent with them, spending and clothing. Besides, you mention that scholars agree that, if there be a valid reason, she may refuse her husbands demands, but NONE of these valid reasons, if they exist, are mentioned or clarified in the hadiths. . Ibn Abbas, The most famous interpreter of the Quran, when asked about this verse and the way you beat the wife, he answered: You beat them with a Miswak Miswak is a thin rod [google images here]. And The husbands rights over his wife are great. In short, some say, cursing a Muslim is not allowed (at any cost) and cursing a disbeliever is OK but not suggested. I hope Im not coming off as someone whos complaining about the sayings of the prophet Muhammed (pbuh), rather I just want more information on this topic. Views : WebThese sayings clearly show that the husband and the wife should feel completely free when they are engaged in mutual stimulation which is known as foreplay. You might begin the conversation by saying, Remember the other night? Rights of Husband and Rights of Wife in Islam In one report, instead of See Khulasat al-Badr al-Munir, 2/438. the angels will curse her till morning. No woman can fulfill her duty towards Allah until she fulfills her duty towards her husband. with her because she is refusing to share his bed, then her sin is even If she is afflicted with illness or meets up with some accident, the responsibility for all expenses will be upon you, as the husband. Create an account, If you do not have an account, you can click the button below to create one, Create new account or her cursing him is a major sin, and they have to repent and ask Allaah Imam Qurtubi in his commentary on Q.2:178 saysshe has over him the same right of sexual cohabitation he has over her. Moreover, Islamic defines some etiquettes for physical intimacy: : : , None of you should fall upon his wife like an animal; but let there first be a messenger between you. The Prophet, , said: No creature should be obeyed when it comes to disobeying the Creator.. Hence, we learn that when the Angels curse the woman till the morning, it is not a vile curse and is more of a condemnation of this act. love and compassion. The husband has the right to discipline his wife if she disobeys him in something good, not if she disobeys him in something sinful, because Allah has enjoined disciplining women by forsaking them in bed and by hitting them (lightly and if there is any benefit in that), when they do not obey. This was the view of al-Tabari. Praise be to Allah. Thank you. Sexual Techniques Jacobina Martin. These are general terms, which include both night and day. I am fasting twice.. preserve the family and take care of the rights of the children, if there Log in, Join our e-mail list for regular site news and updates, All Rights Reserved for Islam Q&A 1997-2023. Is that the only meaning of these Hadiths? The husband should realize that he is a shepherd and is responsible for his flock. Considering the above, such misconceptions are very likely to occur. (interpretation of the meaning): but men have a degree (of responsibility) over them. is as described below: Abu Hurayrah (may Allaah be pleased with him) said: The Messenger WebThis is a fundamental ingredient of the marital union which, if deliberately distorted, destroys the marriage at its very root. If the wife insults and reviles her husband, then he must Marry repose in them, and He has put between you affection and mercy. her. Ibn Khuzaymah and Ibn Hibbaan report a hadeeth narrated by Jaabir: There Log in, Join our e-mail list for regular site news and updates, All Rights Reserved for Islam Q&A 1997-2023. Islam has enjoined upon the husband duties towards his wife, and vice versa, and among these duties are some which are shared by both husband and wife. the fast. Allaah] will be angry with her, until he (her husband) is pleased with Allah says (interpretation of the meaning): It was also narrated from him i.e., Ibn 'Abbas that this means: they have the right to good companionship and kind and reasonable treatment from their husbands just as they are obliged to obey the commands of their husbands. [Jami` at-Tirmidhi, Book 12, Hadith 15]. By Allaah, I feel shy of giving you examples of the humiliating insults I am exposed to, given that she adheres to Hijaab and knows the danger of her conduct quite well. Please read this section in the article above Why do such misconceptions arise from such Hadiths?. If a wife refuses to respond to her husbands request for intercourse , she has done something haram and has committed a major sin, unless she has a valid shari excuse such as menses, obligatory fasting, sickness, etc. The husband must have a good attitude towards his wife and be kind to her, and offer her everything that may soften her heart towards him, because Allah says (interpretation of the meaning): and live with them honourably. [al-Nisa 4:19], And they (women) have rights (over their husbands as regards living expenses) similar (to those of their husbands) over them (as regards obedience and respect) to what is reasonable. [al-Baqarah 2:228]. The author of Lisaan al-Arab [a famous Arabic-language dictionary Translator] said: Lan (curse) means being cast out far from goodness, and it was said that it means being cast away far from Allaah, and from people. There is a mutual dependency. If that is not possible then strive to protect your daughter and Islam is the truth and it is for all. Islam Q&A, You can ask your question on the website via this link: https://islamqa.info/en/ask, Password should contain small, capital letter and at least 8 characters long, Log in Allah says in Surah Ar-Rum, verse 21: And one of His signs is that He created for you spouses from among yourselves so that you may find comfort in them. We live One of the rights that the husband has over his wife is that he should be able to enjoy her (physically). This explanation looks more like a far-fetched contrived argument than an actual clarification. said: I disobey Allah then I see that in the attitude of my mount or my If she still doesnt come in the mood, it may be natural biology, psychology, or nature and may fall under the subjective valid excuse definition. Is this a fat-fetched interpretation? I have alerted her many times, but she soon returns to her habits. Your rights over your women are that they should not let anyone whom you dislike sit on your bed and they should not let anyone whom you dislike enter your house. It is narrated from the Messenger of Allaah, sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam, in an authentic Hadeeth, that he said: Abusing a Muslim is disobedience, and fighting him is disbelief. [Al-Bukhari and Muslim] It is also proven that he, sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam, said: It suffices a Muslim for evil to despise his Muslim brother. [At-Tirmithi] There are further narrations indicative of respecting the inviolability of a Muslim as a Muslim person, let alone his being a husband, in which case the inviolability is more grievous, and the sin of breaking it is graver. On the other side, the husband has to fulfill the sexual needs of his wife, if he notices that she wants to have sexual intercourse or asks him to do so. Good points but perhaps I didnt clarify well enough. Who does not want sukoon (tranquility) in marriage? So if you see an innovator, you do not say, May Allaah curse you, rather say, May the curse of Allaah be upon those who introduce innovations, in general terms. [Sunan Ibn Majah, Vol. Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: When a Cursing the kuffaar and sin in general terms, such as saying May Allaah curse the Jews and Christians, or May Allaah curse the kaafirs, evildoers and wrongdoers, or May Allaah curse the wine-drinker and thief. This kind of curse is permissible and there is nothing wrong with it.